"Examine the nature of unborn awareness."
It took me an extra week to realize why I was having trouble with this slogan. It turns out I had a preconceived notion that the nature of unborn awareness would be a warm and comfortable feeling - something I could really snuggle into. That is not my current situation.
My assumption is rooted in that analogy about the clouds not being the sky itself, spoken in regard to the delusions of our minds and Buddha nature. In reading the slogan, I assumed that unborn awareness was synonymous with Buddha nature and that this examination would occur during a clearing of the mental clouds, however brief.
I've had none of that over the past couple of weeks. So I assumed I was not connecting with the teaching. In fact I was too buried in my unborn awareness to examine it.
Can anyone say irony?
I may be faced with a very big decision in the next few weeks. In this waiting period, my mind has been flying around in circles. It's filled with words and scenarios and what-might-happens. There is a roiling in my stomach that gets worse when I'm trying to sleep (I’m writing this at 1:00 am). It only occurred to me ten minutes ago that this is the exact unborn awareness the slogan is referring to. In this case I'm not experiencing a soothing place of meditative bliss, but rather the piercing discomfort of uncertainty.
There is nothing about my current circumstance that can be dealt with. Nothing can be done to make it dissipate before the natural conclusion of these events. The Third Lojong phrase is telling me my job is to simply notice the discomfort and stay with them.
As Pema Chödrön would say, I have to become "curious" about this feeling and avoid running away from it. Talking won't make things go faster. Thinking only results in revolving thoughts. Therefore, I am left with only sit and stay, Fido. Stay! Yes. Thank you for this lesson.
Can I go to sleep now?
Last Thursday, it finally happened. I was hacked. It started with the notice from my internet service provider that there was malware on the Average Buddhist site and that they had shut down my whole account. Six days of back and forth with technical support and it's finally gone. Gone too is the WordPress architecture. It seems that keeping up with the precautions necessary for using an Open Source system is beyond what I have the time resources for. So I begin again.
The most obvious buddhist message in this debacle is that of the Impermanence of all things. It's what I thought of first, but as I rebuild No Ground is what really stands out for me. Why? I'm not one of those millions of people out there who uses weak passwords or who shares passwords between sites. My user names are also quite diverse. It never occurred to me that the software I was using would have backdoors open to any hacker or bot that happened by. Despite everything I try to do to protect myself (or my things or my blog or my family and friends), there will be things that happen anyway. There is no way to be in control of all of our outcomes. There is No Ground to cling to in that regard.
In No Ground though we can have experiences we might not have, like the generous support of some folks from the Facebook group who helped me understand how to retrieve the bulk of my posts from the internet ether. I had the opportunity to be grateful. Retrieving the posts gave me a change to skim them again and revisit the thoughts of Average Buddhist past.
In honor of the relaunching of the blog, I am re-posting Average Buddhist's very first blog post, which is about the most inspirational person I have had the good fortune of meeting - Arthur Lessac. I'll work on repopulating the archives over time. I hope you enjoy this new beginning.
When You Walk, Do You Feel Like You're Dancing?
(Original post date: 4/15/11)
It’s funny that the first post in a blog about Buddhism isn’t going to talk about Buddhism at all. I’m not going to talk about how much I love Pema Chödrön or expound on my insights into life. Instead, I’m going to honor the spirit of a man who recently passed away and who was for me one of the most inspirational people I have come into direct contact with – Arthur Lessac.
For those of you who don’t know of him, he is one of the great voice/movement/expression teachers of our time. And “our time” is expansive in this sense. Arthur Lessac died at age 101, only a few days after teaching an extensive course in Croatia.
Arthur Lessac (see URL below)
I met Arthur Lessac last year (2010) at a course with speech-language pathologists and singing teachers (of which I am both). One hundred years old at the time, he bench pressed a 200 pound man, led us in movement and dance exercises and spoke in a voice as clear and strong as anyone I’ve known. He exuded a joy in the exploration of life that was both genuine and inspiring.
Walking to work this morning, I thought about him and remembered how he used to encourage us all to walk as if we are dancing. Energy (NRG) will carry you in a way you wouldn’t expect. I thought about his demonstration of that last year and some clips of him in memorium that I watched yesterday. So, I started to dance to work, copying his bouncing and circular arm and leg motions and I was instantly consumed by joy.
This was the most intensely genuine emotional experience I have had in quite some time. It was akin to my experience in sitting meditation with a Zen group, when they asked us all to turn around and face the wall – WHITE. That was it. Today; JOY. That was it.
So, that is why I decided to write about everyday Buddhism. See you soon!
To learn more about Arthur Lessac’s work, visit: http://lessacinstitute.org
(link updated 1/28/15)
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